Now Playing Tracks

  • DC:

    Wonder Woman is too difficult to find a movie audience for-

  • Marvel:

    YO YOU LIKE BLACK WIDOW? HERE SHE IS IN THE NEXT CAPTAIN AMERICA MOVIE WITH A TON OF SCREENTIME AND MAJOR ASSKICKING SKILLS

  • DC:

    We can't allow the lesbians in Batwoman to get married in the comic, sorry.

  • Marvel:

    HEY GUESS WHAT WE'RE GONNA FEATURE A GAY WEDDING ON THE COVER OF AN X-MEN ISSUE

  • DC:

    The new direction for storytelling needs to be dark, gritty, mature and cynical.

  • Marvel:

    DUDE CHECK IT OUT LOKI GOES SPEED DATING IS THAT NOT THE BEST SHIT EVER

  • DC:

    After years of rumors, the Superman/Batman movie is finally coming, but with a new actor and suit for Batman and MAYBE a cameo from Wonder Woman.

  • Marvel:

    PHASE 2 MOTHERFUCKERS EVERYONE IS IN EVERYONE'S MOVIE AND THERE AIN'T NO STOPPIN US NOW

  • DC:

    We can try to add maybe one or two 'people of color' to our lineup...maybe...

  • Marvel:

    NEW MS MARVEL THAT'S MUSLIM AMERICAN, BITCHES.

  • DC:

    We feel no problem with Batman's vengeful personality being like wet cardboard.

  • Marvel:

    NEW LATINA GHOST RIDER WHO SEEKS VENGEANCE WHILE TAKING HIS AWEET LIL BRO FOR ICE CREAM

  • DC:

    We can't mention any superhero titles in our movies, that's ridiculous.

  • Marvel:

    FUCK YEAH YOU WANT A RACOON VOICED BY BRADLEY COOPER WITH A GIANT GUN? YOU WANT VIN DIESEL PLAYING A TREE? AMY FUCKING POND PLAYING A SEXY BALD SPACE PIRATE? HERE YOU FUCKERS GO

  • DC:

    Our fanbase is mostly white males, I'm sure our focus is-

  • Marvel:

    NEW SHE HULK LINE WHERE SHE GOES TO COURT THEN SAVES NEW YORK

  • DC:

    Wait-

  • Marvel:

    NEW FEMALE THOR

  • DC:

    I didn't-

  • Marvel:

    NEW BLACK CAPTAIN AMERICA

  • Marvel:

    TAKE ALL THIS COOL SHIT MARVEL BE OUTIE

  • Marvel:

    PEACE

tardiscrash:

crowley-for-king:

to-boldly-go-down-on-me:

The idea that nerds are awkward and don’t ever socialize is the stupidest stereotype ever because like

Have you ever seen two nerds together?

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A CONVENTION?

Give us a topic of a common interest and we’ll socialize way past what normal people can tolerate.

Just because we don’t want to talk to you doesn’t mean we don’t want to talk.

(Source: fucksebastianstan)

Marvel Studios’ Chris Crisis (Chrisis)

ladamania:

Marvel: So for Thor we’ve cast Chris Hemsworth…

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Me: Ooo, he’s hot!

Marvel: Then for Captain America we’ve got Chris Evans…

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Me: Also extremely hot.

Marvel: Now to complete the Chris trifecta we’ve cast Chris Pratt as Peter Quill in Guardians of the Galaxy.

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Me: Andy from Parks and Rec? He’s more goofy-cute than hot.

Marvel: We will make him hot.

Me: Yeah okay….

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Me: Wha?!

Marvel: You’re welcome.

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